Need
by many things converge
Summary: At night, he dreams of Warren. How he wanted things to be, and how they really were. ONESHOT About Warren and Andrew's relationship, and how Andrew's dealing now. Slash.


**A/N:** A diferent take on the Andrew/Warren thing, I think. It's been floating around in my head for a few days, but I'm not sure if I've done it justice. Well, I hope you enjoy it anyway! ONE-SHOT

**Need**

At night, he dreams of Warren. How he wanted things to be, and how they really were. He used to dream of him, even when Warren was still alive. They started out good, and that's the way Andrew wants to believe he was. He was fifteen when Warren first kissed him. He was always the one to make the first move. Andrew was just a nervous little geek. He had kissed back. They were in Warren's room watching Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back, in the dark. And in the blue-white glow of the screen Warren looked like half an angel as he turned to face him. After that, every time Andrew came over, they didn't even watch Star Wars.

Nobody knew about it. Not until Jonathon walked in on them when Warren had his hand up Andrew's shirt. Stormtroopers were marching accross the screen. All he had said was, "Oh. I'll just come back later." Andrew had freaked out at first, but then Warren had laughed. And it made him feel better. It was when Andrew met Lisa that things started to change. Warren and Jonathon had been his only friends for so long, he was glad when he found a new one. Andrew knew in his heart that he would only ever love Warren, but no matter how many times he told him that, Warren wouldn't believe. And he walked home on a Tuesday night with the very first bruise. It was on his cheek, and he told his mom he fell at school. And he still loved him.

The next day Warren said he was sorry, and that he'd never do it again, and that the thought of Andrew being with anyone else just drove him crazy. Andrew believed him, because he knew that Warren really did care for him. It was sad, he thinks now, that he was so blind. It _is_ sad, he thinks, that he still loves the fucker. Their relationship was always private, and it wasn't a decision they made together, it just sort of happened. Jonathon accepted it, and he didn't really mention it all that much, except in passing. Andrew hadn't talked to Lisa since that day, and he and Warren were back to being happy. For a while. Other things happened. Mistakes that Andrew didn't know he'd made. More bruises, this time where no one could see, and after, Warren would always beg Andrew to stay. He'd cry, and say he was sorry, and that he needed help, and that he loved him. And Andrew stayed.

The first time they had sex was on Andrew's 16th birthday. Andrew snuck into Warren's room, crying. That was the day his father left, and his mother fell apart. And that was the day that Andrew needed Warren most, and he was there. And Andrew knew that he needed him to always be there. At first they just lay on Warren's bed until Andrew's tears stopped, but soon Warren's soothing, murmuring lips were on his, and they were kissing. And Warren's hand was down his pants. And then the pants were off. Andrew remembers that night like it were just five minutes ago. Because Warren was gentle. He kissed the bruises, and caressed the scars, and Andrew saw the boy he fell in love with.

So now he's living with the Slayer, practically under house arrest. And still, Warren invades his dreams. He thought his obsession died with his lover, but then The First started talking to him. The boy he fell in love with was back again! Until he found out that it was all fake. But he's used to that. Some people take things for granted, and some people put too much value in things that don't matter, or aren't worth it. And he knows he was one of the latter. But even knowing that doesn't help the burning ache he still sometimes feels, way deep down in the pit of his stomach. It's when he feels weak. It's when he remembers that gentle touch, that first kiss. And, yeah, Warren was an asshole. But, he thinks, even assholes need someone to love them.


End file.
